worst quest text ever?

Parental Mastery

Summary:
Destroy Torjar's Bane.
Rescue Hemet Nesingwary Jr.


Description
If them tablets were correct, all ay got ta do is a small dance ritual and the big thing o' the deep will be summoned.

When it comes out, we'll get 'em and show me pop we are both true big game hunters like him. 


What's wrong with this quest? Well lots.

• The quest text gives you no clue where you must go. It gives you a hint when it mentions what will be summoned, but that's all. It has been pretty hard - ever since Blizzard introduced  automatic quest tracking on maps - to actually complete new quests only by reading the quest text: i.e. only by following the questgiver's instructions. Now it seems Blizzard expect you to use the quest tracker on the map. This, of course, makes most "Find X" quests trivial. In this case, here's what the quest text tells you:

If them tablets were correct, all ay got ta do is a small dance ritual and the big thing o' the deep will be summoned. 

A little context is needed here, because you have to understand what the adventurer knows about them "tablets". The short answer is "Nothing." The longer answer is "Almost nothing". And the complete story can be discovered by reading the introduction to this quest  was Tortoise Mastery. Let's just check what that was about (you'll have to look it up on wowhead, because of course you can't read it in-game any longer - you just handed that quest in):

Granted, tortoises are not big game but they can be mean game. They also work as the perfect bait for bigger game!
Gotcher found some ol' tablets sayin' that the Torjari Pit is a sacrificin' site. The old empire used ta' feed unruly sorts to the waters as it were.
Well ah mean to see me what's down in that water. Gather up some fresh tortoise shells and meet me at the pit. 

Let's see if ol' legends be true.

So, let's see then. Some guy called Gotcher (don't ask) found some tablets (don't ask). As a result, you have to collect tortoise shells (don't ask) and then meet young Nesingwary Jr (I'll call him Jack). Let's see. You get this quest at "Nesingwary's Safary". You look at your map, and head off in the direction of the Torjari Pit. When you get there, you find yourself among ruins populated by tortoises. You kill the innocent tortoises until you have the appropriate number of shells.

You're about to return to Nesingwary's safari camp, when you remember that Jack said he's meet you at the pit (that is, you remember, if you're doing the quest the same day as you got it). Sure enough, there he is among the ruins. You hand in the quest to him, and give him the tortoise shells (I still don't know what he wants them for), accept the next quest, and he disappears. This bit is very important, though you would never know beforehand. You have to watch what Jack does next. If you blink, or read the quest text, or look in your bags, or examine your quest log or scan for danger, you missed it. He disappears by jumping into the water, while you're still reading the quest text.

Water? Oh, yes. Apparently there's a pool of water behind him. You never saw it because you approached from Nesingwary's camp, and came to the ruins first (which are labelled Tortuja's pit on your map). In fact just a metre north of the ruins lies the pit proper.

Okay, so you didn't see where Jack went, you were busy reading the quest text. But that'll tell you where he went, right? Well, to repeat myself, here's what the quest text says:

If them tablets were correct, all ay got ta do is a small dance ritual and the big thing o' the deep will be summoned. 

What to make of that?

• The map gives you no clue where you must go. Okay, so you realize the quest text is, let us say, confusing. Not unusual these days; Blizzard have a problem with storytelling. You have to use the map. You switch on quest tracking and look for the question mark. There it is, a big bright yellow question mark in the middle of the plains nearby. Off you trot, and find that there's a quest beast called Darkhide here. You reread the quest text for the tenth time. How to make Jack appear? Waiting around doesn't work, and is dangerous in this highly populated plain. You kill Darkhide. Nothing (unless you had a quest to kill him, in which case you can loot his head). Reread the text. Still nothing. The quest synopsis says "Destroy Torjar's Bane". You look around for such a creature or item. Nothing. You /dance. Nothing

Finally, you give in, and check wowhead. In a comment there, Stansdad has the answer. It's underground, as you may have guessed if you'd remembered and understood the quest text of the previous quest in the chain. You have to go down into the pit and swim into a cave. But, wait. That question mark should have been the grey-yellow hue of an indoor/underground quest, not the bright-yellow glow of an outdoor/same-level-as-me quest.

All's well that ends well, I suppose. But how could this text ever have become the full textual description for this quest:

If them tablets were correct, all ay got ta do is a small dance ritual and the big thing o' the deep will be summoned.

When it comes out, we'll get 'em and show me pop we are both true big game hunters like him.

Postscript: I know this is a storm in a teacup, but writing about it has proven quite cathartic!